day in, day out: dealing with the daily dullness
when i get depressed, it becomes extremely clear that my daily routine consists of nothing productive or fulfilling in the slightest.
don't get me wrong. i love my friends and family. i'm lucky to have what i do- but there's a great and vast emptiness inside of me that just won't go away.
describing the shape of this emptiness isn't why i'm writing this, though. i'll spare the details. instead- i'm hoping to make a list of things that i actively want to work towards. not things that will fix the days like this, but bigger, broader goals that give me something to work on the days i feel halfway decent.
here's the list: there's more- of course there's more- how can you fit an entire solution to something so daunting into a single list? but this will do for now :) it's a start. some things i can do on days i feel okay that'll help me on days i don't.
- i want to read more. i want to challenge my brain in a way that only learning can do. i want to read fiction that makes me feel, and non-fiction that makes me think.
- i want to listen to more podcasts. (see reasoning above)
- i want to write stories. i want to develop my current worlds i've created and put them onto paper. i want to contribute to the world in a way only i can.
- i want to clean my space. i want to feel happy and healthy, mentally and physically.
i got this. ୧ʕ•̀ᴥ•́ʔ୨